I don’t like visiting that relative of mine
I can’t speak in front of that crowd
I feel they are all judging me
Don’t we all? It’s a human tendency after all- to fear the wrath of judgement.
Let’s take a step back for a bit & reflect on this.
How long can we fear judgment from others? And yes, understanding patterns & evaluating/judging someone is indeed a skill, not all of us have it. But it’s a known fear, one that a majority of us might have. To sum it up in a single question-
What is someone going to think of me?
Yes, it is true. There will always be people out there to judge you without reason, to frown upon your every action, to make you question every decision you take.
What makes it distasteful is jumping the gun, making negative assumptions, allowing those perceptions to bias us & basing all future conversations on those attributions.
Our minds have become so moulded with the fear of judgement, that we have allowed it to control our decisions regarding anything- whether it’s career, relationship, hobbies.
Even today, people choose to walk the path that is walked by everyone else, rather than take a new road, just because we are fearful what others might think of us.
How can we stay behind this line?
- Start with what led another to become this way, instead of why are they this way
- It’s very easy to create a negative perception about someone; look for positives
- Attributions support us in making sense of why people do what they do. Be sensitive & kind
- We have all fallen prey to judgments; make a conscious effort to remember how it feels when you unconsciously make attributions about others
- Be kind. Even when you are perceiving someone, be gentle & kind in your ways.
In this process, you will experience multiple mental trust falls. Some would drop you in safe hands & some straight to the ground.
But non-judgmentality will always leave you with new learning